February 27, 2006

I received the following e-mail from a very “progressive” friend (did you know that the word “liberal” is no longer politically correct, by the way), and thought that I should see what sort of sense I make out of them from the point of view of a lover of liberty. Obviously, many of these are targeted at the current administration, and at “fundamentalist” Christians, and “ conservatives.”

1. WE TRIED OUR BEST -- HALF OF AMERICA
Hmm. You don’t suppose that there might be SOMETHING else one could do besides just vote for who gets to be “massa” this four years?

2. BLIND FAITH IN BAD LEADERSHIP IS NOT PATRIOTISM
This one isn’t bad at all – unfortunately, most people don’t realize it applies to BOTH of the old parties.

3. IF YOU SUPPORTED BUSH, A YELLOW RIBBON WON'T MAKE UP FOR IT
Another truth – but one that could have applied just as well if Kerry had been the winner.

4. POVERTY, HEALTHCARE & HOMELESSNESS ARE MORAL ISSUES
Yes indeed, they are. And therefore too important to be left to the government, as is clearly the thought here.

5. RELIGIOUS FUNDAMENTALISM: A THREAT ABROAD, A THREAT AT HOME
Wrong! This is the philosophical version of the classic Marxist economic fallacy: that only labor should be used to establish the value of a product. That was demolished very ably by Robert A Heinlein in “Starship Troopers” – a good cook can make a lovely pie from a bowl of apples while a bad cook can ruin the apples for any use whatsoever, but neither the bad cook nor the good cook can make a mud pie edible. This assumes that all religions are alike and of equal value (or rather lack of value) – which is indeed not the case. Fundamentalism is not a threat unless the religion (system of values) it seeks to emphasize the fundamentals of is itself bad. We’d all agree (well, I like to think so), that a Baalist fundamentalist might be a threat (especially if their version of Baal was Molach), as would an Aztec religious fundamentalist. To some of us, Islam fits into that category too, but very few will find modern Christianity or Judaism to fit in that category, even if they are (as some lovers of liberty tend to be) very much against religion in general.

6. GOD BLESS EVERYONE (No exceptions)
Hey, another one I can agree with, at least in the aggregate sense. But then I have to ask, are we supposed to ask Him to bless child-molesters in their endeavors? Or con-artists? Or government goons? Or hit men? Best leave this alone, but in your prayers, you might not be blamed for paraphrasing Paul the Apostle: “Follow me as I follow Christ” and pray for the blessing of God on all men on their endeavors for good, not evil.

Mama's Note: We must indeed love the sinner (we are also sinners) and hate the sin. Our prayer should be that the sinner is brought to understand and repent of his sin (as we are called to) so he can receive all of God's blessings. God makes the rain to fall, and the sun to shine, on everyone - the "just and the unjust."

7. Election 2004: "TIS THE TIMES PLAGUE WHEN MADMEN LEAD THE BLIND" William Shakespeare (King Lear)
Now, this is a quote of the Bard good for around the clock, around the year, and around the country, and like some of the earlier ones, applies whichever person had won in ’04.

8. "THEY THAT CAN GIVE UP ESSENTIAL LIBERTY TO OBTAIN A LITTLE TEMPORARY SAFETY DESERVE NEITHER LIBERTY NOR SAFETY" (Benjamin Franklin)
Ah, my favorite quote from old Ben himself, and I have to admit that I am very surprised to see a “progressive” so willing to put this on their bumper. Clearly, they haven’t thought through the consequences of applying this to all actions of government, like gun control, the war on some drugs or a good many other things.

9. WHO WOULD JESUS BOMB?
Fortunately, as with the root question (What would Jesus do?), He already answered that for us, and I think that eternal Hellfire is just a wee bit worse than napalm, don’t you? “Or don't you know that the unrighteous will not inherit the Kingdom of God? Don't be deceived. Neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor male prostitutes, nor homosexuals, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor slanderers, nor extortioners, will inherit the Kingdom of God.” (1 Corinthians 6:9-10) “Then the lawless one will be revealed, whom the Lord will kill with the breath of his mouth, and destroy by the manifestation of his coming;” (2 Thessalonians 2:8).

The point is, however, that it is GOD who will do this punishment, not man either individually or as a mob, a posse, an army, or a nation, or an alliance of nations. Bombing is seldom a defensive tactic or strategy, especially not for individuals.

10. I'D RATHER HAVE A PRESIDENT WHO SCREWED HIS INTERN THAN ONE WHO SCREWED HIS COUNTRY
How about NEITHER? Not that President Clinton wasn’t guilty of both of these crimes (yes, and I consider sex outside marriage to be a crime because it is a violation of a legally-binding contract between two people). And even if President Clinton hadn’t abused the entire nation by dozens of his acts, the idea of having a man with that kind of power who can’t control his urges enough to keep his word in the “minor” realm of marriage should make us all sick. But as President Bush proves, just because a man apparently CAN learn to be moral in his “private” life, doesn’t mean his morality extends to the nation or the world as a whole.

11. JESUS WAS A SOCIAL ACTIVIST LIBERAL
I suppose, to quote the president I so maligned above, it depends on the definition. But certainly there is nowhere recorded in the Bible or elsewhere that Jesus advocated ANY government intervention in the provision of benevolence, including food, housing, education, health care, or anything else that the modern “social activist liberal” believes is the paramount reason for government to exist. Rather, He encouraged, yea, commanded, that His followers do that themselves, voluntarily and not under coercion of the government or anyone else – He advocated a “faith-based” solution to the age-old human problems of poverty, sickness, and teaching; a solution anathema to today’s “ liberals.”

12. MY VALUES? FREE SPEECH. EQUALITY. LIBERTY. EDUCATION. TOLERANCE
How can a modern liberal be so hypocritical as to put this sticker on her bumper? Of course, a “conservative” could probably also see their way to doing that, and be equally hypocritical. The problem is, they can’t put all the caveats on the bumper sticker (not enough room, even at 6 point type): FREE SPEECH (Unless it is offensive to some one or opposes their world view), EQUALITY (“Some animals are more equal than others,” though – and we can all equally be slaves of government), LIBERTY (As defined by our “massa” of the year, clearly – and only in economics or personal affairs, not both at the same time), EDUCATION (provided it is ruined by government and paid for by theft, usually – and designed to make better slav… citizens), TOLERANCE (apparently for evil and sleaze and corruption and irresponsibility and congrus-kritturs that reek of pork and oil).

13. IS IT 2008 YET?
No, but it certainly is 1984. Ignoring the 2006 elections, let me quote Ambrose Bierce (I think): “If voting really changed anything, they’d outlaw it. ”

Mama's Note: I was unable to verify the origin of the quote, but found a very interesting link to Bierce anyway.

14. DISSENT IS THE HIGHEST FORM OF PATRIOTISM
Thomas Jefferson Again, I am surprised, nay, shocked that a “Progressive” would have this fine saying on their car’s bumper. Of course, if it were Billary in office, I’ m sure it would get scraped off posthaste. Dissent does no good if it is selectively based on WHO is in power and not WHAT power is being abused.

15. DON'T BLAME ME. I VOTED AGAINST BUSH TWICE!
Please! You, and the rest of the American people who talk this way, continue to promote and support the system that made it possible for one man to have the stupendous power and lack of morality that made those elections mean what they have. The higher the stakes, the more people scream, and it is not like electing the other Old Party banner-bearer to Chief Massa would have made much difference.

16. NOBODY DIED WHEN CLINTON LIED
My, how quickly the memory fades. How many times did Clinton order the bombing of Iraq and other places, how many Iraqi aircraft were splashed by RAF or USAF attacks flying over their own country, with Clinton’s approval. How many Americans (and Somalis) died in Mogadishu on his watch? What about Bosnia and Serbia and Kosovo? And don’t forget about Mena, and Mr. Brown. What a lie this sticker is.

17. OF COURSE IT HURTS. YOU'RE GETTING SCREWED BY AN ELEPHANT
Not that donkeys (or is it jackasses) hurt any less. And it ain’t any better if it is just an eagle: it’s government, not just who is in power!

18. ANNOY A CONSERVATIVE; THINK FOR YOURSELF
No doubt. But substitute “LIBERAL” or “AUTHORITARIAN” or “POPULIST” or “ BUREAUCRAT” or “CONGRESSMAN” and it is just as true. No statist or tyrant, from the local Mrs. Grundy to the Emperor, wants you to think, no matter how much they tell you to.

Obviously, many of these next items are targeted at the current administration, “fundamentalist” Christians, and “conservatives.” Since I have been accused of all of these things and more (such as being a “theonomist”), I am uniquely qualified to respond, or so I reckon.

19. CORPORATE MEDIA = MASS MIND CONTROL
A liberal should know. And it is not as if “Government Media” doesn’t equal the same thing. I believe this one, because a Liberal would know exactly how much “mass mind control” the media has, since they control both the corporations that own much of it and run the newsrooms and editorial offices in most cases as well.

20. STOP MAD COWBOY DISEASE
I presume that this (like those following) is a bash at Bush, but in reality most Liberals would apply this to anyone who wears a wide-brimmed hat and boots, with or without jeans. Some of the major enemies of both conservatives and liberals live and work in the great outdoors of the West, doing “cowboy” type things like raise cattle, sheep, ratites, and Cain; and things closely related, like mining, driving big pick-em-up trucks, cutting trees, and other things which are horrible and hideous reminders of our past liberties and what made us the envy of the world. That “frontier” attitude associated with cowboys, schoolmarms, sky-pilots, gamblers, and others just rubs the authoritarians and statists raw.

21. GEORGE W. BUSH: MAKING TERRORISTS FASTER THAN HE CAN KILL THEM
Well, maybe, but he’s just following the tradition of his predecessors, isn’ t he? FDR had to work hard to make the Japanese our enemies; Truman couldn’ t send a clear signal to North Korea that the US would respond to an attack; Kennedy constantly gave a boost to Che and Fidel in the early ‘60’s, and when we get to Johnson and Carter and Clinton, well, this is supposed to be a column, not a book. (Of course, I can remind us of the same things for Harding and Coolidge and Hoover and Ike and Tricky Dick and George Bush I, but this is an anti-Republican sticker, clearly.)

22. WHERE ARE WE GOING? AND WHY ARE WE IN THIS HANDBASKET?
A question that could have been asked starting in about 1860 and the election of Abraham Lincoln (who by the way got a smaller percentage of the popular vote than Bush did), and every president since then. As for “why” – well, look in a mirror, folks! (For my personal answer to that, go down to sticker #35 and read the lengthy quote there.)

23. KEEP YOUR THEOCRACY OFF MY DEMOCRACY
What Democracy? We are supposed to be a republic, and the Founding Fathers intentionally made sure that it was NOT a democracy, although we’ve done a good job of unraveling or just plain ignoring their work. To quote John Adams: “Remember, democracy never lasts long. It soon wastes, exhausts, and murders itself. There never was a democracy yet that did not commit suicide.” At the same time, given the usual definition of “theocracy” (rule by priests or a religious hierarchy of some type), I agree with the bumper sticker: especially when it comes to that theocracy that worships the State (or Government, if they prefer) as God. Which brings me back to “democracy” – the idea that “ the voice of the people is the voice of God” – that a majority vote can change anything: laws of nature, morality, anything. At least the true theocrats pretend that there are absolutes more than the next ballots.

24. DEMOCRATS ARE SEXY. WHOEVER HEARD OF A GOOD PIECE OF ELEPHANT?
Sorry, you readers are going to have to put your own comment for this one – anyone who would write this sticker, much less put it on their vehicle, is crude and tasteless and their behavior should be treated with the contempt their crudity deserves.

25. ASPIRING CANADIAN
Please. Soon. Need help packing? Most people do not realize that Anglo-Canadians are for the most part the people of whom Sam Adams wrote: “If ye love wealth better than liberty, the tranquility of servitude better than the animating contest of freedom, go home from us in peace. We ask not your counsels or your arms. Crouch down and lick the hands which feed you. May your chains set lightly upon you, and may posterity forget that you were our countrymen.”

They are the Royalists, the Loyalists, the survivors of the one-third of American colonists who stood up “For King and Country” and the authoritarian Parliament that trampled on the rights of free Englishmen. Go north, “ Progressive” – it will improve the genetics of both nations.

26. CORPORATE MEDIA: WEAPONS OF MASS DECEPTION
I certainly won’t argue with this one, but as with its close relation (#19 above), the liberal masters of the mainstream media are in a unique position to know the truth of this statement. As P.T. Barnum is reputed to have said, “You can fool all of the people some of the time, and some of the people all of the time” but not until the development of the Yellow Press, the ancestor of today’s television news networks, did anyone try to fool all of the people all of the time.

27. DON'T CONFUSE DYING FOR OIL WITH FIGHTING FOR FREEDOM
I am reminded of Patton’s speech: “Your duty isn’t to die for your country, it is to make the other poor (bleep) die for his country.” Freedom comes in a lot of flavors – as the son of Texas pioneers and fourth-generation oil field, a refinery or a pumpjack’s smell is the smell of money – a comfort odor, not the disgusting environmental hazard that most people claim it to be. But fuel is also the smell of freedom, and one of the big problems that liberals have to answer for is that their own actions have made the United States far more dependent on foreign oil than it should be – so if they are right and American troops are dying in Iraq to secure our energy supplies (a contention I do not believe can be supported by the facts - $87 billion (see below) could have bought an awful lot of crude oil, among other things) then who is to blame? Of course, for many liberals, fighting for freedom is just as bad as dying for oil, anyway.

28. STEM CELL RESEARCH IS PRO LIFE
The same thing could be argued about Mengele’s research and that of others of the Third Reich: if they had been allowed to progress, we’d still be benefiting from their research. Why not just go straight to vivisection on criminals, the insane, the mentally-deficient, the old, and those deemed “not up to standard” in the first six months of life?

Mama's Note: We need to make sure we remember the difference between stem cells taken from murdered embryos and those recovered from newborn cord blood and other living sources that don't need to be killed to harvest them. The research on moral source stem cells will indeed benefit all mankind one day, but the murder of any innocent life will condemn us all. The sad part is that embryonic stem cells are not superior in any way.

29. HATE, GREED, IGNORANCE: WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION
True – as the Islamistic fanatics of the world are showing us again and again and again. The West and the US in particular are plagued with these ancient evils, but the problem pales with comparison to the Third World, and especially the Dar al-Islam. In AD 1000 or so, Arabic (Islamic) culture was possibly the highest, most advanced, in the world – certainly challenging China. But it was a pre-industrial, pre-scientific culture, and since then it has lost ground continually, if not in territory controlled and people tyrannized, then certainly in terms of wealth, comfort, and tolerance. If the West that they hate so much were to disappear or instantly become part of the Ummah (world Islamic community), the rest of the Arab world would slide back into the abject poverty of a Palestinian “refugee” camp or a Cairo slum. For 1200 years, the Arabs rode across the top of the massive wealth of the oil fields and did nothing with it – it took the West to suddenly make something of it, and now their greed exceeds that of the West.

30. HONOR OUR TROOPS; DEMAND THE TRUTH
Maybe I shouldn’t find this offensive, but I do. Perhaps it is because “ demanding the truth” isn’t nearly enough to honor troops. If we want to honor our troops, we should make that bitter and cynical motto about Congress (“ You are marines [insert “soldiers” if you wish] in order to die, and Congress will send you where you are supposed to die”) obsolete and part of ancient history by giving the men and women who try to serve this country and the cause a freedom a government worth honoring itself. More than truth is necessary: courage and conviction on the part of the elected officials and bureaucrats to do the right thing, not the politically expedient thing, are necessary. Of course, bumper stickers make everything sound so simple, don’t they?

Mama's Note: And where do we find officials and bureaucrats like this? As long as human beings are put into these positions we will have the natural outcome: corruption and the ever growing addiction to power. Only self-government and the voluntary association of people will overcome this - and will make the terrible sacrifice of soldiers everywhere unthinkable and unnecessary.

31. REBUILD IRAQ? WHY NOT SPEND 87 BILLION ON AMERICA?
Oh, now THERE’s a good idea! How about another 87 billion in transportation pork projects, like more bridges to nowhere? Or how about an additional 87 billion wasted in supporting the educrats and toilets of government-ruined, theft-funded schools, or perhaps 87 billion more in block grants as welfare to developers and their big-city-hall friends to take land from the owners? Why not just let the taxpayers keep it and spend it as they like – even if that includes buying Chilean fruit or Chinese toys? The problem with too many liberals is that they don’t believe it is wrong for the government to steal money from the taxpayers for ANY purpose, just for the purposes that the liberals think are wrong.

32. FACT: BUSH OIL 1999 - $19 BARREL 2005 - $70 BARREL
Well, it is fact; but… For one thing, it is rather hard to blame just Bush, or even the entire Bush administration, for this increase in price, which is directly related to an increase in demand. And that demand comes from places like China and India; so unless you believe that somehow, the Bush administration should slow down or stop economic progress and development in those countries (by what – nuking them?), it is hardly under Bush’s control.

Also, the development of our own energy alternatives in this nation has been hampered by a series of actions and inactions due largely to Congress, and happening largely before 1999. This includes moratoriums on drilling and oil/gas field development in much of the nation but also includes development of nuclear power, utilization of energy crops such as hemp and jojoba. Sadly, one thing I have noticed is that many “progressives” have no real understanding of cause and effect, or that sometimes effects may take months or years to manifest themselves, long after the causes happened. (Witness the claims that there is no problem with Social Security because the “insolvency” is still decades away.) They seem incapable of understanding that on world or national economic scales, events and decisions in 1990 or 1995 will result in problems which do not happen until 2000 or 2005. Call this “stock market” mentality (only the events of today and yesterday have an impact on today’s stock prices) or the “campaign” mindset (if something bad doesn’t happen before the next election as a result of what I did, I’m in like Flynn).

33. THE LAST TIME RELIGION CONTROLLED POLITICS, PEOPLE GOT BURNED AT THE STAKE
Really? Forget about the Puritans who came to America (and got their name changed to Pilgrims) and established what eventually grew into a republic for religious purposes. Forget the basis of the abolition movement was those same religious “bigots” who couldn’t stand to see someone own another person and wouldn’t allow “diversity” (“half-slave, half-free”) in their own country. Forget about Martin Luther King, Jr. and his many followers who, because of their Christian beliefs, thought that segregation was wrong; or Desmond Tutu, who for the same reason believed that Apartheid was wrong; forget about John Paul II who dedicated his life to his religion and also to seeing Poland freed from the anti-religious tyranny of Communism. Yeah, there are a lot of bad examples of religion in politics, too: Catholic versus Protestant in the Northern Ireland troubles; Orthodox, Catholic, and Muslim conflicts in Bosnia and the rest of the Balkans, Muslim persecution of Christians and animists in southern Sudan, and a lot more. But fortunately, the Inquisition of the Counter-Reformation or the witch-burning at Salem were NOT the last time religion controlled politics.

I’ll leave this subject with a quote from John Adams: “We have no government armed in power capable of contending with human passions unbridled by morality and religion. Our Constitution was made only for a religious and moral people. It is wholly inadequate for the government of any other.”

34. I'LL GIVE UP MY CHOICE WHEN JOHN ROBERTS GETS PREGNANT
Who is John Roberts? Oh, yeah, that’s right, the new Chief Justice of the Supreme Court of the United States. Cute. Apparently, what this bumper sticker is saying is that anyone who isn’t capable of getting pregnant shouldn’ t have an opinion or a say-so on who can get an abortion or not. Of course, I’ m assuming that “choice” is the usual buzzword for “abortion.". Interesting. So men have any "choice," of course, even if they are one-half of the parents (“takes two to tango” even with modern medical technology) of the child being aborted. But that also means no post-menopausal women, either (or most of the female population over age 50 or so); and no pre-menses women (children) either, and no one with a hysterectomy or sterile, and probably no lesbians, since they can but won’t.

I haven’t seen poll figures that break it out that way, but I suspect that “pro-life” females of childbearing age and ability probably equal and very likely may outnumber “pro-choice” females in the same category. Of course, then the liberals suddenly remember we are a “republic” and NOT a “democracy” and therefore, majority suddenly doesn’t rule. Right. Of course, in reality, no woman has to give up “choice” – she can choose (except in very rare circumstances) NOT to have sex, that is, to avoid the only thing that can cause a “fetus” to “squat” in her body. But as I said, that is not what “choice” means in the liberal lexicon.

35. TRUST ME, I NEVER TOLD A SINGLE SOUL TO VOTE FOR BUSH (Jesus)
You know, I think they are right! The only “bush” anyone in the Bible had anything to do with at all was that burning one, back in Midian. A guy named Moses bought into a whole lot of grief over that one. Which reminds me, I saw this really funny cartoon about Moses and the Ten Commandments just the other day – and the artist isn’t in hiding from the ADL or the Greater New York Rabbinical Association, either.

No, Jesus never told anyone to vote for, or against, Bush or Kerry or Badnarik. But His Father did once warn His people, as is recorded in 1 Samuel 8, starting with verse 6: “ … they said, "Give us a king to judge us " And Samuel prayed to the LORD. 7 The LORD said to Samuel, "Listen to the voice of the people in regard to all that they say to you, for they have not rejected you, but they have rejected Me from being king over them. 8"Like all the deeds which they have done since the day that I brought them up from Egypt even to this day--in that they have forsaken Me and served other gods--so they are doing to you also. 9"Now then, listen to their voice; however, you shall solemnly warn them and tell them of the procedure of the king who will reign over them." 10 So Samuel spoke all the words of the LORD to the people who had asked of him a king. 11 He said, "This will be the procedure of the king who will reign over you: he will take your sons and place them for himself in his chariots and among his horsemen and they will run before his chariots. 12"He will appoint for himself commanders of thousands and of fifties, and some to do his plowing and to reap his harvest and to make his weapons of war and equipment for his chariots. 13" He will also take your daughters for perfumers and cooks and bakers. 14"He will take the best of your fields and your vineyards and your olive groves and give them to his servants. 15"He will take a tenth of your seed and of your vineyards and give to his officers and to his servants. 16"He will also take your male servants and your female servants and your best young men and your donkeys and use them for his work. 17"He will take a tenth of your flocks, and you yourselves will become his servants. 18"Then you will cry out in that day because of your king whom you have chosen for yourselves, but the LORD will not answer you in that day." 19 Nevertheless, the people refused to listen to the voice of Samuel, and they said, "No, but there shall be a king over us, 20 that we also may be like all the nations, that our king may judge us and go out before us and fight our battles."

Oh, dear, you suppose the religious fanatics like Samuel might be right, 3000 years later? Liberty, and lovers of liberty, have nothing to do with the modern liberals and liberalism that put together this wonderful collection of bumper stickers. I pray that we lovers of liberty will never be as blind as the people who stick these things on their cars, and that we can learn from their negative example how not to be so bigoted and self-righteous.

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