December 29, 2003

On this Orange Alert holiday season we should take time out to thank our nations leaders both past and present for all the things that have made life so easy and enjoyable today.

Let's give thanks;

-For a Department of Homeland Security (the worlds biggest bureaucracy) that has given us a beautiful color coded alert system (I wonder If next year we can hang decorations on it) and for only a few hundred billion dollars keeps us all "safe" and "secure."

-For the Patriot Act that really makes life hard on terrorist (just ask Osama), so what that it violates the constitution and disrespects our right to privacy.

-For federally protected airports, flying has never been safer, easier or as pleasant thanks to all those very well paid federalized security personnel (Is it just me or do they look like the same "underpaid" and ineffective bunch that was there before 9/11/01)

-For a preemptive war policy, so what that it's barbaric, needlessly causes folks to loose there lives and has attracted the ire of the world (let them eat camel dung).

-For the occupation of Iraq sure it will cost countless lives and hundreds of billions of tax dollars, but at least Saddam is caught and can't use all his "Weapons of Mass Destruction" (that our leaders sold him) on us like he did on the Kurds 16 years ago (have they found all those huge stockpiles yet?).

-For a huge national deficit, It's so reassuring to know that our president and congress don't find it necessary to accompany tax cuts with spending cuts (who would have thought you can have your cake and eat it too?).

-For The Income Tax and Withholding, how ingenious and thoughtful of our leaders, not only relieving us of the burden of income, but doing it in a way that makes us almost oblivious to it (ignorance is bliss).

-For Social Security, how can we ever repay all those that gave us such a cheap and efficient retirement system. I'm sure we are all looking forward to our golden years and the life of relaxation and leisure that they will bring thanks to Social Security. (How can you beat it all the dog food and day old bread you can eat for only 15% of your income?)

-For the War on Drugs, it has kept drugs of our streets and put them in the hands of radio talk show host. The fact that "illegal" drugs are cheaper and more available today than they were at the start of the "war" should be no indication of it's level of effectiveness. (Who needs dangerous and illicit marijuana? When you can get safe and legal oxyconton).

-For Medicare, Medicaid and Prescription Drug program, soon we will all be dependent on the benevolence and efficiency of government for our healthcare (Can you think of a more effective way to control the ever increasing population?).

-For The Supreme Court, that has guaranteed fair elections (especially "fair" to incumbents) by Upholding the McCain and Feingold Campaign "Reform" Law. Besides who needs that pesky First Amendment, it just gets in the way of "fair" elections anyway?

I'm sure we can all think of many more ways our government and its leaders (both here and gone) have made our lives much simpler and safer today. This holiday season don't forget to give thanks for these folks and all the wonderful things they have done for all of us. Have a happy and safe Orange Alert holiday.

Visit Emiliano's own site.

Archives

Capitalist Eye for the Communist Guys

Teach the Children Well

Giving Freedom, Trade and Anarchy A Bad Name

Freedom Hijacked